True influence

Context:
I engaged in small talk after lunch with friends in office one day, and before I realized, we were talking of investment. “One tends to invest in properties that have either been highly recommended or where more than two friends decide to go it or where you have close ones. Mind you, your close ones are invariably your in-laws, your wife’s relatives.” I couldn’t avoid a laugh. It might have been derisively stated, but it is true as Hailey’s comet. Simply put, this is the ‘True influence’ in a man’s life.

Backdrop:
Man is a simple being with not so simple needs. Hence most of the times men find themselves out of sorts with real life situations. We want to keep really complicated things very simple. “Simple --- isn’t it?” is the way to conclude a really complicated discussion. We like to arrive at conclusions and we like to believe “Yes we did it. It was challenging, but what are challenges when faced with the whole of I-me-myself!” In a nutshell men are complicatedly simple.
Women are the exact opposite --- they are simply complicated. Complications are a part of a woman’s simplicity. In this labyrinth of simply complex compartments that constitute a women’s mental setup, is housed a closely guarded perimeter. This is her “my family” section. Most men find the definition of this “my family” difficult to understand. Well most men spend their lifetime attempting to understand it. Those who do manage to crack the riddle spend their lifetime attempting to qualify as family.
A marriage is depictive of this unnatural agreement that men and women give into, out hope for reaching sync for posterity. Never seen that happen though! While much has been spoken of the man woman mental composition, I for one am a big fan of this subject, who likes to revisit it time and again. Simple as I am, I like to derive simple pleasure out of indigenous analysis. An analysis that holds men at a higher pedestal as God’s creation vis-à-vis women. Not really conceited, eh!
M.C.P. was the word that friends and foes used to describe me and I hold no grudges to that. I grant every human the freedom of thoughts and expression, even at the cost of defame. With time and age, I have gained experience, rare experience that has gone into building my M.C.P-ness further and more precise.
Out of a 100 married friends that I studied as part of my “post nuptial arrangement”, I can safely say that over 85 can be easily be classified as “wife driven”. While it may not be a bad idea to be wife driven, it certainly comes across as feeble. Many smart men voluntarily fall under this category, after definitive planning. “Doing so keeps the arrangement going, as well as feeds the vanity of the partner!” is what they say. So the man’s world shifts from his home, parents and relations to his wife’s within a few years of marriage. Kids are the final nail in a man’s “my life-my priority” coffin. Kids have a definitive bend towards the maternal side with a serious disconnect towards the paternal side. This is true for the whopping majority of married friends I have observed, so far.

Analysis:
Remember the term “home maker”? A very informative piece of nomenclature, it is. Women are the ones who run the show at home. With the proliferation of the micro-family syndrome in urban India, they are left with their own devices to manage and optimize? Given a lack of association with the husband’s side (read parents) in the initial stages, the lady perseveres to take charge of not just her own but her husband’s and her kids’ lives. Very soon, all the effort hits a crescendo and falls in perfect harmony. Not all women are accommodative, well even men aren’t, so altering the way things are done, suddenly, is added challenge that they grapple with, in excess of the already pledged task of taking care of the (useless) husband and kids. Symptomatically husbands forget to introduce the lady to his side of the world, so the handshake seldom happens, leading to the much discussed situation. After all, if you didn’t help her when she was struggling in the initial stages, you can ill afford to advise her, once things are streamlined. That is so “not done”!

Remedy:
I invite one and all to share with me “panacea” for this widespread malady!